Tuesday, April 11, 2006
The story of a man looking for a perfect match- A Motivational Story About Searching For Life Partner
As Salaamu 'alaykum and peace to all,
I was looking into my diary and just realized that tomorrow will be my parent's 36th wedding anniversary. Masya'Allaah. It shall be both a happy and sad day for my dad. Since 10 years ago, he has changed the way he celebrated and remembered that special day. It used to be a night out for a romantic dinner for the whole family plus a beautiful and really special gift for my mum. I love to watch the display of affection and love he had always shown her. But now, it is only visit to my mum's grave. Yes, my mum passed away 10 years ago.
My dad's undying love for my mum is one in a million. She passed away in his arms. He was carrying her (actually running) to the car to rush her to the hospital when she suddenly developed difficulty in breathing right after the Isya' prayer. And she passed away before he could get into the car.
And tomorrow, i know my dad will be in the mosque for his Fajr prayer and will visit the love of his life's grave right after. He can spent hours there. Only Allaah knows what he does there. Then, when he comes back, he shall locked himself in his room, until one of us knock his door and make him open it.
My dad used to say that before he married my mum, both of them created a list. A list of things that they both like and love about each other, things that they cannot change, things that they can change, their values and expectations of each other. Talk about being practical!
My dad insist that there is no perfect match in this world. What is there is only two people, trying to match all their likes and dislikes, and complement each other's strengths and negotiate their wants and needs so that they can live loving each other and live harmoniously together. And of course, by the mercy of Allaah, bestow upon them pious children.
Surah Al-A'raf : Ayah 
It is He Who has created you from a single person (Adam), and (then) He has created from him his wife [Hawwa (Eve)], in order that he might enjoy the pleasure of living with her. When he had sexual relation with her, she became pregnant and she carried it about lightly. Then when it became heavy, they both invoked Allah, their Lord (saying): "If You give us a Salih (good in every aspect) child, we shall indeed be among the grateful."
I remember reading this story about the perfect relationship...
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, and good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand! you need television."
Isnt that funny? I find the story to be hilarious!
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.
Is marriage that important for a Muslim?
4776. It is related that Anas ibn Malik said, "A group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet , may Allah bless him and grant him peace, to ask about how the Prophet worshipped. When they were told, it was as if they thought it was little and said, 'Where are we in relation to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, who has been forgiven his past and future wrong actions?'" He said, "One of them said, 'I will pray all of every night.' Another said, 'I will fast all the time and not break the fast.' The other said, "I will withdraw from women and never marry.' The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, came to them and said, 'Are you the ones who said such-and-such? By Allah, I am the one among you with the most fear and awareness of Allah, but I fast and break the fast, I pray and I sleep, and I marry women. Whoever disdains my sunna is not with me.'" The Sahih Collection of al-Bukhari
This hadeeth has shown us the importance of marriage institution in Islam. I am sure we all know that. But, what we usually fail to understand as told in the story above is the criteria of a spouse that we should be looking for. Tall, dark and handsome could be a line many of us girls frequently say. The same goes to the men. Fair maiden would be their guideline.
Seriously,whom should we marry? What do we look for in a spouse?
Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet said, “A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be losers. Volume 7, Book 62, Number 27:
The guideline is so simple and straightforward. Deen should be the criteria of seeking a spouse. Simple, yet, many of us find difficulties to follow. Are we going to take the advice by our beloved Prophet Muhammad SAW or are we going to end up with a television? :)))
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Copyright (c) 2007 Sis Zabrina at 9:35 PM